The following was published in the 2007 Spring Edition , Living With Loss

For years my husband never had to buy a card for birthdays or anniversaries. He wrote everything himself, words from the heart. After our son Greg 13 died of suicide, my husband could not write a sentence that made any sense.
I could never write. The day after Greg died, I picked up a pencil and started writing. It has taken a year, but my husband picked up a pencil and wrote this one night. I am so proud of him and the distance we have both already come. Now we are both writing and trying to help others in the journey of loss and their grief work.

Written by my husband one year after our son died.
“I wanted my life to return to normal. Then I realized what I wanted was for my life to return to what it once was.
A year ago I found hope one night when I heard my wife and my youngest son laughing in our bedroom. I thought my life was returning to normal.
A year later I played cards with our youngest son after supper, with much fun and laughter. After a few cartoons he and my wife were off to bed. It was then that I realized that my life was not returning to the normal that is was when Greg was alive, but changing to new normal.
I can not return to what I once was, because all of the parts are no longer there.
I have made the choice, consciously and subconsciously to carry on with my life, thus creating a new normal.
Hope lies in accepting what you now have, looking back with joy, not sorrow. Looking ahead with optimism not pessimism.”
Daryl Hutson
Crawfordsville IN 2006