November 21 2005
I love you. I miss you terribly. I keep thinking I should be looking at what to get you for Christmas. I see things and want to buy them so badly.
I feel like you are walking around here all the time. Yesterday I was in the kitchen and I heard you come in and I turned and said my usual “Hey Babe” I wanted to reach out and touch you, to feel you.


December 2005
All day long I listen for your step, your sigh, your smile.
I listen until the silence tightens around me and I don’t think I can take another breath.
Oh God you know I would give my life to hear your voice again, to feel you and hold your hand, to touch your face.
To just stand and watch you. I would give my life I say and yet how could I do that to your brother.
XOXO Mom